You may be familiar with the term “allowable weakness” from the wonderful work Dr Meredith Belbin has done on team roles.

 

And in the context of Dr Belbin’s work, the concept is one of strength in one area being at the cost of what might be seen as a weakness elsewhere.

 

I know it might not be fashionable to talk about weaknesses – and in a leadership and coaching context, I much prefer to think of development and difficulties – but in truth, I love this phrase “allowable weaknesses” and wanted to share with you when it helps me the most . . .

 

Any time I’m getting frustrated by, annoyed at, despairing of someone close to me . . . well, if I’m lucky, I stop those negative emotions spiralling into resentment by remembering that we all have allowable weaknesses. It’s a good technique that’s carried me through much inward commentary on others’ behaviour, and meant that I’ve worked through the problem I had with them before it even became a problem.

 

In short: is the allowable weakness I see in that person enough to halt our relationship? Rarely.

No one is perfect.

(But please don’t tell my husband that. Allowable weaknesses? Moi?)