I would like a superpower. Nothing too extravagant or destructive. It’s simple really. I’d like to be able to instantly do the following when I’m in a public place and being more than a tad annoyed by people around me:

Turn down the volume of loud people

This would apply whenever:

• They are in a café where I’m trying to enjoy a quiet moment and they’re talking at someone
• A car pulls up alongside me and their music is drowning out my enjoyment of Radio 4
• When I’m in any public place and someone is regaling someone else with stories of their decidedly uninteresting life in close proximity to my earshot
• When someone’s making too much noise with their cutlery on a plate or dish.

Is my superpower too much to ask for?

Really?

Ok then …. I’ll just have to keep doing what I normally do: inwardly seethe, keep my thoughts to myself and take a deep breath and remind myself that no one but me is getting cross.

Sometimes you need to know which battles to choose.